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I dont know much.

But I know I Love You...

7/13/08 10:14 pm - So I've changed a bit...not 100% accurate

DisorderRating
Paranoid:Moderate
Schizoid:Low
Schizotypal:Moderate
Antisocial:Low
Borderline:Moderate
Histrionic:Low
Narcissistic:High
Avoidant:High
Dependent:High
Obsessive-Compulsive:Low

-- Personality Disorder Test --
-- Personality Disorder Information --

6/19/08 12:18 am - Wow

I hate men.

4/4/08 05:29 pm - I miss this more than anything

chikenfajita: wanna chill tonite?
JBDunedain13: do you have a freezer big enough?
chikenfajita: will you be able to get all the gloves off before monday?
JBDunedain13: y?
chikenfajita: hahaha very funny
JBDunedain13: inst it
chikenfajita: y what?
JBDunedain13: why do i have to take off the gloves b4 monday?
chikenfajita: well i guess you can, but i dont know if youd wanna "chill" with 60 pairs of gloves on
JBDunedain13: why monday though?
chikenfajita: because its the first day that came to mind, okay
JBDunedain13: lolx
chikenfajita: ?
chikenfajita: lol
JBDunedain13: so....
chikenfajita: ...
chikenfajita: was that an answer?
JBDunedain13: yes, yes it was
JBDunedain13: answer for?
chikenfajita: the question
chikenfajita: dur
chikenfajita: :-P
JBDunedain13: you diddnt answer mine
chikenfajita: wanna chill tonite?
chikenfajita: i askeded first
JBDunedain13: and i answered your question
chikenfajita: with a question
JBDunedain13: exactly
chikenfajita: okay
chikenfajita: would a regular maytag refridgerator work?
JBDunedain13: is a refridgerator a freezer?
chikenfajita: is a freezer a refridgerator?
JBDunedain13: Does this seem like Whose Line to you?
chikenfajita: are you liking it as much as i am?
JBDunedain13: How much are you liking it?
chikenfajita: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?
JBDunedain13: wouldnt a wood chuck chuck all the wood he could chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?
chikenfajita: wouldnt the wood chuck get full?
JBDunedain13: wouldnt he keep what he couldnt eat in the maytag refridgerator?
chikenfajita: can you loan him the money to buy one?
JBDunedain13: do wood chucks have wallets?
chikenfajita: is there even a woodchuckurrency?
JBDunedain13: isnt that two words?
chikenfajita: wood chuck or chuck currency?
JBDunedain13: should you know?
JBDunedain13: souldnt**
chikenfajita: hehe...didnt you just tell me that you know all?
JBDunedain13: arent you listening?
chikenfajita: am i supposed to be listening?
JBDunedain13: dont you love me anymore?
chikenfajita: whats in a name?
JBDunedain13: why wont you answer me?
chikenfajita: which question am i supposed to answer?
JBDunedain13: are you trying to ignore the question at hand?
chikenfajita: who do you think started this?
JBDunedain13: are you trying to turn this on me?
chikenfajita: do you i should be?
chikenfajita: lol you think i should be*
JBDunedain13: does that make sense?
chikenfajita: didnt you make sense of it?
JBDunedain13: are you calling me stupid?
chikenfajita: do you think i would actually do such a thing?
JBDunedain13: ahfvhasdji
JBDunedain13: ajksbhvgasbvjilasdf
JBDunedain13: jklabnvnvjk
JBDunedain13: cassie just called me
chikenfajita: have i stumped thou?
chikenfajita: isnt that ironic?
JBDunedain13: lolx
chikenfajita: does she want me to call her?
JBDunedain13: she ruined my thunder
chikenfajita: do you think i should?
JBDunedain13: lolx
chikenfajita: i just got hit with a damn bolt im on fire
JBDunedain13: huh?
chikenfajita: do you really not understand or are you trying the question thing again?
JBDunedain13: what do you think im trying to do?
chikenfajita: what am i, a mind reader?
JBDunedain13: dont you think theyre crooks?
chikenfajita: do you have 5 dollars so i can look into my crystal ball and tell you?
JBDunedain13: do you think i would waste my money on that?
chikenfajita: would you rather buy a corn dog?
JBDunedain13: do you actually like those things?
chikenfajita: who really does?
JBDunedain13: who doesnt?
chikenfajita: wait...do you think that i do?
JBDunedain13: am i being called?
chikenfajita: is your phone ringing?
JBDunedain13: cant you hear it?
chikenfajita: does it sound like a cross between happy birthday and a cow mooing?
JBDunedain13: what are you smoking?
chikenfajita: dont you know?
JBDunedain13: is it that stuff you bought from me?
chikenfajita: do you mean the purple stuff?
JBDunedain13: isnt that the only stuff i sell?
chikenfajita: how am i supposed to remember?
JBDunedain13: doesnt the purple stuff enhance memory?
chikenfajita: was it the blue stuff then?
JBDunedain13: the stuff that causes cancer?
chikenfajita: that stuff causes cancer?
JBDunedain13: you dont have cancer yet?
chikenfajita: isnt there an incubation period?
JBDunedain13: whats incubation?
chikenfajita: didnt you hatch baby chicks in kindergarten?
JBDunedain13: what do you think i am some kind of savage?
JBDunedain13: i wasnt supposed to eat the eggs?
chikenfajita: have the cops found you yet?
JBDunedain13: there on to me?
chikenfajita: do you think maybe Cassies with the cops?
JBDunedain13: youve thought bout that too?
chikenfajita: is there a reason you have the icon i wanted but my computer rudely wouldnt let me get?
JBDunedain13: thats the icon?
chikenfajita: the one from buddyicon.com?
JBDunedain13: dont you know its from badassbuddy.com?
chikenfajita: dont you know the stuff you gave me really doesnt help with memory?
JBDunedain13: did you know i happened to be thinking of you when i picked this icon?
chikenfajita: is that an insult?
JBDunedain13: you were gonna pick it werent you?
chikenfajita: what are you trying to say?
JBDunedain13: dont you know i love you?
chikenfajita: did you ever know that youre my herrroooooo?
JBDunedain13: am i the wind beneath your wings?
chikenfajita: is my maytag big enough to chill in?
JBDunedain13: did you know i was bout to say that?
chikenfajita: do you know you make me laugh so hard?
JBDunedain13: 
JBDunedain13: am i some kind of comedian?
chikenfajita: did that cat eat my prozac?
JBDunedain13: you take prozac?
chikenfajita: dont you know i switched meds two months ago?
JBDunedain13: arent we supposed to be hanging out?
chikenfajita: didnt i say that half an hour ago?
JBDunedain13: how the hell am i supposed to know it was your anal depostory?
chikenfajita: what?
JBDunedain13: so what are we going to do about this situation?
chikenfajita: which situation?
JBDunedain13: dont you realize we keep avoiding it?
chikenfajita: do you believe im really TRYING to?
JBDunedain13: avoid it?
chikenfajita: isnt that what was implied?
JBDunedain13: so where do you want to chill?
chikenfajita: well dont you want smores?
JBDunedain13: diddnt we already discuss my failing memory?
JBDunedain13: wouldnt i love some?
chikenfajita: would you?
JBDunedain13: it depends on who makes them
chikenfajita: do you know i burn them every time?
JBDunedain13: dont you know im great at making them?
JBDunedain13: diddnt you see my cooking award?
chikenfajita: dont you know im talking to Cassie?
JBDunedain13: how am i supposed to know?
chikenfajita: so youre good at making smores?
JBDunedain13: diddnt i just say that?
chikenfajita: are you planning on actually making them or just boasting?
JBDunedain13: wheres the supplies?
chikenfajita: where does the wood chuck keep his wood?
JBDunedain13: why dont you tell me?
chikenfajita: dont you know i cant lose this game?
JBDunedain13: do you think i can?
chikenfajita: hasnt "cassie called you"?
JBDunedain13: why dont you ask her?
chikenfajita: dont you know i was just on the phone with her?
JBDunedain13: diddnt you tell me?
chikenfajita: why should i bother her again?
JBDunedain13: dont you wanna find out?
chikenfajita: dont you wanna come over?
JBDunedain13: do you want me to?
chikenfajita: do you realize thats the stupidest question ive heard?
JBDunedain13: are you saying im stupid?
chikenfajita: didnt you use that question?
JBDunedain13: did i?
chikenfajita: yup

4/1/08 06:11 pm

Has she not posted since September? Or am I just not included in the set of people she deems worthy of her words?

1/16/08 02:18 pm - Hmm...

Do I want to use this?
Do I want to use this to keep track of what I do, despite the fact that I have a real journal already?
Do I want to use this to entertain others at my expense?
Do I want to fill this with cryptic messages to lovers and friends?
That's the problem. I don't know what I want.
I want her. I want him. She wants me. He wants me. I don't want him. We want each other.
We want this, but not that. He wants that, but not this. One without the other, differing with everybody. When I knew what I wanted, I got rejected by her. She told me she was straight (a story for another day). When I knew what I wanted, I got rejected by him. He told me he didn't like me the "same way" (saw him drunk last week). I give up.
And then there's her. A different her. I don't know what she wants. I'd like to think I'd give it to her, whatever it may be. But certain things scare me, they always have. That word, should a teenager even know it? Commitment. How serious is this? Should I wait until I think im ready, or do i need to conquer my fear by diving in? I wouldn't want it to be at her expense though, if I can't conquer my fear. Or what if she doesn't even want that? What if she just wants to be friends? Or hook up? Or...I'm okay with anything, but I don't know what she wants. I barely know what I want.
Bah, rambling.
Do I want to use this?

3/24/07 10:19 pm - Trust

Joel
Jova
Chris
Casey
Greg

Why arent I with the ones I love most, and show they love me?
I love you guys. More than anything.
Although I like my graphing calculator a lot.

I miss you, even when I'm with you, because I know we can't stay forever.

I had...a good night.
Goodnight.

3/19/07 07:55 pm

Yeah i cant do the friends only thing because i keep forgetting but im going to try to in the future...
I deleted my journal for a week or so because i wasnt writing but i realized i could keep stuff here ... like thoughts and stuff....because i wanted somewhere to type and i realized this was the place.so yeah i dont feel eloquent right now but i really dont care i just want to die ah omg i hate this i have so much anxiety all the time i cant handle it i dont even want to end a sentence to stop speaking with a period perhaps in fear of the second i stop talking is the same second people stop listening to what i have to say......do i have anything to say? Do I have a purpose? Will I make a difference?

10/22/06 06:14 pm

Im not sure how much I like LJ anymore...Not many of my friends post...and many dont read.
Im not that into dishing my life out online and not knowing who actually reads it.
And if youre a close friend...and you care...just talk to me.

10/12/06 03:01 pm

Fuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk...........

4/3/06 11:16 am

I hate a hell of a lot of things.

Number one being lack of sleep.
Two. Lack of good conversation.
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